Sexism is bad. Happy Gender Equality day.

This is why I don't call myself a feminist.

You can argue all you like that a 'real' feminist is only in the middle section where the red and green circles cross. You can also argue that the word 'cool' REALLY refers to temperature and people who use it to mean 'trendy' are using the word wrong. It doesn't change the fact that if you say 'Today was cool' I will have NO IDEA if you mean you had a good day or if you are talking about the weather. If you tell me you are a feminist I HAVE NO IDEA if you care about gender equality or if you think men are scum. It tells me you care about women's rights – that you are in the red circle. It no more indicates that you are ALSO in the green circle than that you are also in the pink circle.

The point of language is to communicate with others. The word feminist does not communicate what you think it should. It could mean too many different things. It's a woolly word – too broad to be useful. (If you want to bemoan this fact then I suggest that you speak out against the pink circle not the green one.)

And another point. If you say 'Today was cool. I wore my hat'', how can you NOT realise that wearing a hat implies you are talking about the weather, not your funky new hat that made you feel great? If you say 'I'm a feminist. Women need x, y and z.' you are implying that you are using 'feminist' to mean that you care about women's rights NOT gender rights. I actually believe that the VAST majority of self-proclaimed feminists are egalitarians. I ALSO believe that most MRAs are egalitarians. But then, I'm an egalitarian.

If you tell me you are a feminist – you are NOT indicating that you are an egalitarian – even if that is your intent. It is not a logical inference to make. Maybe it sucks, but that's the way it will be unless you manage to prove feminists are egalitarians - maybe by NOT using sexist language all the time. Like having campaigns to stop domestic violence rather than ones to stop domestic violence against women. Which I'm afraid implies – I assume unintentionally - that hitting men is A-OK. Laws should not be sexist. Not even accidentally. No person should be allowed to hit their partner. And yet it's tolerated – even expected – for a woman to slap her cheating boyfriend's face. I've done it myself when I was a teenager. (Sorry Dave - you lied to me, hurt me, and treated me very badly - but I had no right to hit you.)  No normal western man could possibly not know that hitting their wife is not ok. MANY women don't realise it's actually not ok to hit their husbands.

I'm an egalitarian. It's a clearer, cleaner word than feminist. If I want to stress I'm talking about gender rights rather than race, sexuality or something else - then I can call myself a gender egalitarian. I find the word 'feminist' just as jarring as the word 'masculinist'.

So there you go.  I am NOT part of the sisterhood - I have a brother, a husband and a son.  I believe they should enjoy the same freedoms I have - to choose whether to prioritise family or career, to choose what clothes to wear, whether to grow their hair long or to speak out without being mocked if they are raped or abused.

Welcome to the siblinghood.